I have ALOT of things going on in my little head. They all relate to fashion and its impact on us XX chromosome carriers. These thoughts have to do with a series of incidents over the last little while. I will just list them in bullet format as I think they illustrate my inner conflict quite well.
- I have stated somewhere in my archives that I think of myself as pretty. I'm pretty damn hot if I do say so myself. However, I am physically lacking in certain areas - I'm no DD cup size. This used to bother me, but not so much now. I'm happy with my body and my cup size. That's not to say having a small cup isn't annoying. Certain styles of clothing just don't look good or adjustments must be made because dress makers think that a person with a 26" waist totes has HUGE knockers. During awesome BIL's wedding, a cousin remarked that a particular lingerie shop carried awesome push up / padded bras. Without thinking I remarked that wearing padded / push up bras was against my feminist beliefs. EVERYONE was like WTF?? I think this whole idea that you must have cleavage to be attractive is bullshit and I don't give a rats ass to spend triple the amount on a bra just to let people think I have huge boobs. I don't. I am happy with my boobs, so is monkey and so is his dad. Yes monkey likes my boobs, they did fed him for over a year.
- While christmas shopping for my niece, I totally annoyed the sales lady because I refused to by mix and match fashion type toys for my not yet 4 year old niece. Nor did I want to buy a kit that allowed her to make different types of lip gloss. Nor did I want to be shown anything remotely makeup / fashion typy. Why the fuck does a NOT YET FOUR year-old need to worry about make-up and clothes? I'm not saying I didn't love to dress up my barbie, I did. I was EIGHT!!!. Right now, all she needs to do is play with stuff that makes her creative, teaches her to ask questions, peaks her curiosity and imagination. NOT fucking CLOTHES! FYI she cared more about monkeys trucks on Christmas day than anything else. She made her aunty proud!
- I was at swimming with awesome inspiring friend when I told her she inspires me to not give a shit about what I look like. Which really came out like I was implying she looks like crap, which is totally not what I meant (I know you know that JV!) My friend JV is a total surfer girl who put very little effort into fashion or makeup. She places more importance on who she is than what she looks like. I love that. I think a big part of my emphasis on looking good had to do with my inappriopriately placed emphasis on judging someone on their appearances. Putting greater emphasis on what they looked like instead of who they were. Consequently, I put emphasis on my appearance because I felt that was how I was being judged. JV really has changed me to a more balanced emphasis, I care more about who I am and who my friends are then what I or they look like.
- I watched Legally Blond 2. I love Reese Witherspoon and the message that she is sending about not judging someone because they like fashion. Yet in the movie, she would make-over the not into fashion smart girls so they could catch a man. Again emphasizing that how a woman looks is more important than who she is. Whether you're the pretty one or not you get judged on looks. Basically I felt the movie was saying you have to look pretty, even if you're smart, too get noticed. But hold on, don't look too pretty because then you can't be smart. WTF!!!
- Then I read the latest F-word blog post and Isis's latest post.To which I say I fucking hate fashion!!!!! and the color pink
I'm torn because I love fashion and I have to admit I had a love affair with pink. Yet I don't want my niece to be a slave to it. I'm torn because the idea that I shouldn't be judged because I am into fashion is an OK message to send but the idea that fashion doesn't matter is considered insane. In Legally Blond 2, smart lawyer wasn't noticed until she was made up, there is more pressure on moms' to lose that baby fat and be MILF because some how mothers are not inately not fuckable. Oxymoron since obviously I'm fuckable since I've fucked to have kids.
The idea that something has to be girly to attract girls drives me batshit crazy. Don't worry you can be sexy AND smart because you know, being sexy is way more important. NO! NO! NO! or that you can be SMART and sexy because you know whats the point in being smart if you're not sexy.
Yet the idea that being girly is somehow negative also annoys me. What is wrong with being a girl? Why is being girly such a derogatory remark? Being boyish isn't considered a bad thing. Which is when I realize that its the FUCKING JUDGEMENTS that piss me off. Its the emphasis on the appearances and image as apposed to who were are that is wrong. I love fashion because it allows me freedom to express who I am. I hate fashion because it put emphasis where it shouldn't be. I wonder if we put more emphasis on who are, like my friend JV, would we as a society have a better understanding of the complexity of people? would we finally realize that you can not label someone girly or not girly because those labels only touch a fragment of who someone is?