Friday, May 2, 2008

A 2 post day

Today is going to be a two post day. Mainly because I didn't get around to finishing my ramblings on negativity in science until this morning, but mostly because I didn't realized that the virtual shower for HBM and Mrs. Chicky had already begun. I have already delurked with HBM, but have not gotten around with delurking with Mrs. first hey ms.chicky! SOOO happy for you and Mr. C! Have you thought about the name Jasleen? Talk about different and so not a typical name in New England. Sorry, started off on a bit of tangent, lets start fresh...

In honour of HBM, Mrs.Chicky and Mrs.Chicken, who are all expanding their families with child #2, we are writing our favorite advice about having 2 kids. Unfortunately, I have only 1 experiment going on right now so I can not give any advice on dealing with 2 little monkeys. I will, however, expand on a wonderful little bit of advice that I heard yesterday.

It is normal to want to throw both your children out the window.
It is not normal to actually do it.

When I heard this I could not stop laughing, mainly because all week everyone in the research facility has been coming by to tell me what an adorable little guy I have and how they can see he just oozes trouble. (The monkey came to the lab with me last Friday, where he proceeded to charm everyone with his good looks, but also demonstrated what a little imp he can be.) I think there is this belief that 'good' mums are always patience, caring, and nurturing and I think one of the the biggest challenges in being a new mum of one or a new mum of two is dealing with the guilt of not always liking your baby. For me, I can still remember what life was like before the monkey showed up. I don't spend all day and night longing for the time when I could do what I wanted, go skiing every weekend, work late on an experiment, get drunk if I wanted to. But there are days when I want to get drunk, when I want to go out for dinner and not worry about how we're going to pay for it, buy a new pair of shoes or designer jeans. There are times when I think, if I didn't have the monkey, I would have $1000.00 / month of disposable income, but I don't because I pay for full-time daycare. Like I said, I don't spend days and nights regretting or thinking what if. But on those days, when the monkey has tried every last gram of patience I have, pushed and tested every boundary that has been set, I do remember for just a moment. Then he smiles that big smile that melts my heart and all is forgiven.


Whirlwind said...

Ok that made me laugh.

But you know what, there were many times where I would be sitting there rocking a crying child and just think "I want to throw you out the window". And then I'd cry for thinking such a horrible thought!

Chicky Chicky Baby said...

Hey! *waving*

I can't tell you how many times I've wanted to throw my daughter out the window. I'm sure that feeling will intensify X2 w/ the second girl. So far I've been able to contain myself!

Thanks for the advice and the laugh.

toyfoto said...

That is so true.

I have thought about the window often.

Mrs. Chicken said...

I sometimes wish I still worked, so that at least ALL my days weren't smeared with mac n' cheese. Bu you are so right - those smiles make it all worth it.

Thanks for the advice!