And then she soared

I met with Program Chair yesterday, who advised to run as fast as I could from the Institute. He was extremely helpful and sympathetic, not at all the evil evil man that was described. He listened and provided recommendations on who to approach, who was capable of combining good science with good mentorship, a rare find in science. I was honest about my desire to have another child and to be successful. And then I told currentPI. He did not see it coming, he does not want me to leave. I said I would think about it, but really I won't. He had to talk 2 other students off the ledge, perhaps he needs to have student go over to realize the changes he needs to make. The most frustrating part of this situation is that he has the potential to be a great advisor, he could be so amazing because he is an intelligent individual and a kind person. But he doesn't want to grow and I won't not be a situation that is about training and organization. Like a good friend said, labs need to be run like small businesses. They need processes and checks. Program Chair gave some really good hints, and I will check them out. First I will take a break this weekend. Clean my office, paint my house, play with my monkey. Next week is a full week intensive workshop on Molecular Biology Skills. Then I will read the publications of those PI's, I will go and visit all the labs, then I will make a decision. Hopefully the one that I want to go to will want me as well. If not, then I will make a decision about grad school. I will have put me first. I will have put my family second and science third and I'm ok with that.