Tuesday, April 27, 2010

An open letter to my asshat neighbour

Can I start by saying Fuck off?

I understand that waking up at 8:00 am on a tuesday morning is a bit much. Not all of us work 9-5 so I get that you don't necessarily want to hear a dog howl mournfully for 2 hours before going to work. But I've been living on my little corner lot for > 5 years and have never ever caused any problems. No noise, no loud parties, no massive domestic fights. So leaving an anonymous, bitchy note about the fact that the dog was howling and the need for me to find less disruptive solutions was a bit dickish. Firstly because its making me announce to my readers that we have new dog, in a less then happy look at my dog way, secondly because I haven't ever caused any problems before. Do you think that I didn't give a shit? How about knocking on the door and asking me if I need any help? Maybe you could ask if something is wrong with the dog? Something along the line of we never noticed before that you had dog, did you rescue hir? Is she anxious from being abused? Or how about leaving you fucking name so that I can come and apologize and let you know that we just got her and we're trying everything to ease her anxiety, from leaving the talk radio on, crating her, not crating her. Walking her >1 hour in the morning before we leave for work. Spending every waking minute with her for the first 3 days, even in the freezing fucking rain. Why? because we didn't want her freaking out and waking the neighbours. Mr.SM sat with her all fucking night the other day so she wouldn't cry and disturb the neighbours. Want to know what the next door neighbour said? Don't worry about it, we're so happy that your little guy has a friend. We don't mind, it happens while dogs adjust. Because we've been here >5 years and never cause problems dickwad. So if you want me to take your compliant seriously, have the fucking balls to tell me who you are so we can actually have a conversation that might lead to some solutions. Oh and you're not living in the freaking burbs asshole. This neighbourhood has alot more noise than a freaking dog.

Yours truly,

*** I have never ever complained about dogs being noisy. Thats just fucking stupid in my books. Dogs bark and howl. Whatever. The amount of noise a dog makes is nothing compared to the freaking ambulances, trucks, and other freaking noise out there. You're living in the subarbs

and the dog is amazing. monkey is in love. will post about it when i'm not pissed at the fucking neighbour


Venkat said...

Congrats! (I love dogs)

Hopefully, your dog gets more comfortable and less anxious soon and howls with much lesser frequency. That way you can forget about the asshat sooner.

FrauTech said...

8am on a tuesday? Oh come on. In my neighborhood hearing the lawn mowers and weed wackers start going off at 6 or 7am on a saturday morning is pretty normal. Who sleeps past 8am on a tuesday morning? If they are unemployed I think they can deal.

Anonymous said...

when we adopted a dog with separation anxiety, the crate was really helpful. it took awhile. but now, he loves it. and goes in there when he wants to sleep/quite time.

Alyssa said...

Ugh - how annoying that they didn't leave their name!! How the hell are you supposed to talk to them if you don't know who they are?

I'd take a picture of the note and post it on http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/

Anonymous said...

SO been there. And I've tried telling my asshat neighbor that it doesn't help to yell and throw things at the dog when it's barking, but it doesn't do any good... the asshat's feelings towards the dog is now permanently reciprocated.

Which, I think, is what the asshat wanted to begin with. She evidently can't get enough drama from the TV.

ScientistMother said...

VenKat - Thanks! Dogs are amazing aren't they? The dog doesn't actually howl that much, unless she see you leave through the back gate. Its probably because she thinks we're going for a walk without her. We left through the front this morning and she was fine.

FrauTech - I know, 8am is not that early during the weekday. We have a community park in front us and the city is often cutting grass at 7:30am.

Anon1 - My concern about the crate is that there is no where for her to go "potty". the first day we got her, we put her into the crate before we ate (as instructed by the breeder) but we couldn't get her out of it after. It feels like a catch22

Alyssa - Exactly! but to complain after 1 morning? At least see if its a continuous occurance.

Anon2 - i guess every block needs to have a grumpy neighbour, to make the others that much more appreciated :)

Cath@VWXYNot? said...

Sorry, I'm confused - "you're not living in the freaking burbs asshole" in the post and "You're living in the subarbs" in the footnote. You broke my brain.

Congrats on the new dog!

ScientistMother said...

Cath - hehe, see thats how mad i was. i was thinking that if you want quiet go live in the freaking suburbs. Not that I know where that is anymore....